Gewel Kamps | HealthGreatness
Many people live stuck in the past or the future, constantly forsaking the present moment in favor of tremendous worry about what will happen tomorrow or biter regret for things that happened yesterday. Living in this state wastes the precious moments life has to offer, but it also hurts the bonds with your loved ones because you are unable to be fully present for them. Free yourself from the shackles of worry and regret. The moment is waiting for you to enjoy.
Mindfulness is a glorious practice initially created by the early religious during mediation rituals meant to quiet and focus the mind. Modern psychology has fully embraced the practice of mindfulness after practical benefits have been shown consistently in victims of trauma, anxiety, and depression, but mindfulness has been proven to help anyone who practices it.
Example: During stressful times, such as when stuck in traffic, in the store behind someone slow, or getting the kids in bed, instead of feeding into your own anxiety about it, practice mindfulness. Rather then focusing on getting through the situation, instead, fully embrace it. Notice the color of wall paper or people’s clothe. Focus your attention on the temperature of the room, or your own breath. Be compassionate to what the people around you are feeling. Anything to disengage from the stress of the situation while still embracing reality can be a tool. Smart phones are not recommended for this exercise.
Accept Everything As It is and Let Go of Controlling Your Environment
Try letting go of having total control over your environment for a day or two. Accept reality fully for what it is, even if you can only manage to unwrap your mind from it during this exercise. That means essentially to some lowering your expectations to where you truly have not one problem with anything in your immediate reality. This of course does not mean to accept dangerous or toxic environments.
Trust that if you do your best, that is all you can do. Trust reality to take care of you for doing the leg work. This is very hard for some people that worry incessantly about the future and what terrible thing it might bring or not bring. Even an atheist can have faith that they’ve done their best. Faith isn’t confined to religion. It’s a trust that after all is said and done, things will work out.
Sometimes forgiving a person is near impossible or even undesirable. This does not change the fact that resentment hurts the holder more than the resented. It is important for people with resentment to try and forgive because resentment against a person can stay with us to our graves, eating away at our well-deserved happiness. If the grievance is too bad too forgive try looking at the perpetrator as sick or mentally ill to try and muster some semblance of compassion. Remember this forgiveness is for us, not a gift we are giving to the person we are upset with. After we forgive them, we get the gift of never having to think on it again.
Sounds easy enough, right? Learn to recognize when you should HALT and show yourself some special attention: Hungry, Angry,Lonely, Tired. Treat yourself like you’d treat your best friend. That not only includes nice gestures but the way you talk to yourself, your internal dialog. Are you overly critical of your own actions and productivity? Next time this harsh thought process is occurring, stop and ask yourself, “Would I talk to my best friend this way?”